Before dinner while looking at menus, I decided, in an emotional moment that made me cry, to have a glass of champagne to celebrate my treatment results. It's working. Effects are difficult for first day, but it's worth it. I hadn't cried at all when I got the diagnosis, stayed emotionally strong, acted like I knew it would be all right. I didn't. But when I was looking at the wine menu, I had this fuck it all triumphal feeling that I deserved to buy champagne. I was strong and had beaten the cancer so far, and I would be OK. It was a good feeling, but it made me realize how cold and detached I had become because of fear.
I realized I was happy and deserved to celebrate.
Laverne still checks up on me frequently, and she is still my hero.
Jan and I are going to Eureka Springs, AR in June. It's a small town, but it has a great treehouse/cave place made as a hotel. We are staying in a Hobbit's cave that is fully equipped, including wifi, usual amenities for a hotel. Should be a fun change of pace, surroundings, cool in the mountains, at least an night. Driving always scares me, but I'll be okay. It's a 2 day drive. Jan would make it in 1.
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